Hi! I am Amber Simpson, and this is Mark It With An S.
I used to have a really hard time advocating for myself. And, didn’t know that this was really the case until I got pregnant with my oldest child. I went through so many traumatizing things, that, looking back on it now with a fresh lens, I know much of which could have been prevented had I known how to advocate for myself, and to have my husband do the same. This blog idea was formed after I had my second child, and went through a lot of changes, both personally, and with my family. For the first time, my husband and I were balancing two children, two jobs, and a lot of sickness, with little to no support from our inner circle, which to us was our doctor team, work, close friends and family. We have went through and are still going through so much trial and error over the last seven years. Now with three children under six, and two foster children, we navigate life from learning how to be more than just a couple, to balancing our career aspirations and home life, to welcoming my mother into our home after our second child was born, moving, changing jobs, and surviving two years of the pandemic at home with 2/3 children with asthma and significant breathing problems as well as food allergies. Now, emerging from the aftermaths of the pandemic, we have had every feeding issue under the sun, more trips to the emergency room than I would like to admit, and not enough answers. I think what I learned the most, is that I have found my #momroar. My voice. My ability to speak up to the naysayers, to advocate for me for my own health and rights, and for my kids. This is to doctors, jobs, schools, and family and friends, and it has not been easy by any means.
During all of this time, I have went through bouts of feeling very lonely and desperate. I know that every parent goes through this – being up in the middle of the night, searching for answers on their phone or staring at their baby and wondering what is wrong with them – why they are breathing weird, the color of their diapers, why they aren’t eating, projectile vomiting, not sleeping, etc. Also, why am I so tired all the time? Is this xyz symptom normal? Do other moms feel this way or am I crazy? Why is this motherhood/parenthood thing so isolating and hard? It used to be that “it takes a village” was a literal term. People grew up close to their extended family members and were raised by many people in their community. You learned and grew and had support all around you.
That’s unfortunately not the case anymore, at least not in the United States. So, I thought that I would take a stab at sharing what I have learned, helping others who have been there too, and making the pathway easier for those that come after me. I want to be able to share what has worked for me, for my family, and maybe it might help you with something in yours too.
Full disclosure: I am not a doctor, or an expert, or a licensed anything when it comes to this type of stuff. But, I have experimented and sampled, and spent a lot of money and time and sleepless nights looking for answers so I thought I would pay it forward and share it with you all too.
So here it all is. The deepest, darkest, happiest, most stressful, most amazing, contented, magical, dirty, sleepless time of my life. I hope you enjoy and are able to find the humor and the solace in some of this too.